The Realm of the Pachyderm

Haiku #84: Sleep

2012-01-10T23:58:00.004-07:00

Moon drop of darkness,
alight on my pillow, for
Sleep has lost its way.

Let dreams rain on my
eyelids, bidding them slide down
to cover these eyes.

The night is too long
to spend awake and sighing,
wanting only rest.

Would that I could take
the lunar sphere in my mouth
as a bright tonic

to glow away dark,
never wearying 'til morn
when sunbeams do creep

over the treetops
like a child's fingers play
in sleep-tousled hair.

But, dreams are withheld
even as I write sleep thoughts.
Oh, to embrace dark

rather than fear it
would expedite my voyage
to castles on clouds.

Moon drop of darkness,
bless these tired eyes with sleep.
Drift me off tonight.

Haiku #83: Armchair

2012-01-07T11:48:00.003-07:00

Soft rocking armchair
and a list ten miles long:
I haven't done much.

One month passes too
quickly. I am a leaf in
several different winds,

blown a moment here,
then two moments there, never
falling to the ground.

Staying in this chair
would be simple: moving but
without real movement.

Haiku #82: Innkeeper

2011-12-12T15:38:00.003-07:00

Frozen midwinter
stars glint, silently watching
them approach my gate.

He is tired as
he holds the donkey's bridle,
beyond exhaustion.

She, a round vessel
with worried eyes, silently
pleads, "Just one small room."

I too am tired.
They are not the first to come
far too late for warmth.

My rooms have been filled,
and I am concerned with much.
They can not stay here.

And yet, what room I
lack in my inn opens in
my heart for these two.

It is dark and cold,
and they are weary, heavy
with many burdens.

"I have one place," I
reply, "but it is outside.
I'm afraid we're full."

With shining eyes filled,
they follow to my stable:
a hut and manger.

I leave them alone,
wishing I had room on such
a night as this one.

I send my son to
give them bread and a blanket.
I have more work now.

It is not much, but
I have given what I can
with no room to spare.

Haiku #81: Gratitude

2011-11-21T23:12:00.003-07:00

To show gratitude
only during November
is no different

from containing one's
charity to December
or church devotion

to one April morn.
What keeps us from infusing
our entire year

full of Christlike good?
Shouldn't October also
glow grateful and full?

What of August, May?
Fair sister months brimming with
plenty. Full tables.

January, March?
Roaring beast winter derobes,
budding beautiful.

There is wonder in
each appendage of each year,
yet November brings

golden gratitude
like shimmering koi to feast
on humble bread crumbs.

Let each day begin,
end with two love-sweetened words,
November or not.

Haiku #80: Ukraine

2011-11-16T23:23:00.002-07:00

After six months' moons,
silver wings will fly me off
this ground to new shores.

Same air, same water,
same species, but so different.
So not my home self.

New me, new calling,
new tongue. New Russian speaking
self, Ukraine flavor.

Sixteen months to tell
the truth about my Savior:
ancient wine, young flask.

If it weren't the truth,
those silver wings would not soar
me into Ukraine.

But, truth shines truth-bright
regardless of the bearer.
I will go and talk.

Speak. Announce. Proclaim.
Declare. Make way. Rooftop song.
This will be my joy.

Haiku #79: Where We Stood

2011-09-11T13:38:00.005-06:00

Where I stood that day
was pre-: Pre-Algebra for
premature terror.

No equation to
make it all add up: the planes.
The towers. The fear.

A plane in my house,
a plane in my school. Too much
mean faceless fire.

Twelve was far too young
for a terrorist attack.
(What is the right age?)

My teacher told me,
"You're too young to understand."
Premature outrage.

Why patronize me?
Explain terror, explain hate.
Why are we afraid?

That day, she was right.
I could not grasp the airplanes.
The towers. The fear.

Where do we stand now?
No one forgets where we stood,
but where do we stand?

Present tense, not past.
In this time capsule moment,
are we in ashes

or in waterfalls?
In these ten years, I've emerged
from the cave, blinking

out the pain of youth.
I am still too young, but now
I can understand

the planes. The towers.
The Pentagon. The green field.
The fires. The fear.

Where I stand now is
not where I stood before this.
But will I forget?

Will any of us
forget that one crystallized
moment of lost breath?

We strive to forget
ourselves, but never forget
the premature loss

of lives, of futures,
of innocence. We just hope
for the waterfalls

to wash away the
ashes of the burning in
our eyes and our hearts.

Haiku #78: Hurricane

2011-08-27T15:01:00.004-06:00

I missed the earthquake,
so, to be polite, I came
back home for Irene.

Wetly, verdantly
insisting on a moist seep
into my shoes, she

makes herself heard and
seen in downward bucketfuls;
it must be laundry

day on God's terrace.
Standing outside is a bath
I didn't ask for.

But, despite the wet,
there is intense watery
beauty in her storm.

The ground weeps: fullness.
There is a fertile promise
in the sucking mud.

Every puddle is
a crucible for green growth
upon dark clouds' flight.

As the dusk drops fall
on ground too sated to drink,
the contentment of

being indoors and
watching the tempest raging
settles like fine mist

on my damper thoughts.
I will enjoy the raining
as it washes Earth.

Haiku #77: Two Dollars

2011-07-14T15:54:00.002-06:00

Her lunch cost not quite
seven dollars, yet she had
no paper. Just change.

I laughed to diffuse
the awkwardness some people
feel when they pay in

coins, but she only
smiled a self-conscious smile
and showed me her sign:

"Out of work mother.
Hungry and nowhere to go.
My baby needs food."

"I have the money,"
she said, pointing to glinting
change on the counter.

"I didn't mean to
be impolite," I assure her,
"of course you can pay."

After counting out
her bill, she hoisted her child,
still asleep, higher

on her hip, smoothly.
She sat down with her food and
ate with no shame in

her eyes. She had paid.
As she rose to leave, I asked,
"May I give you this?"

Two dollars changed hands.
Not even another meal,
but her gratitude,

in the form of a
quiet "God bless you", confirmed
her need for those bills.

I hope she finds a
bed for her baby tonight,
if not her own bed.

I hope I can keep
her face in my memory
to remind me

to never suppress
a kind impulse. I hope
to learn charity.

Haiku #(17)76: Not the 3rd, Not the 5th

2011-07-04T08:44:00.004-06:00

The flag flies greater
every fourth day in July:
as if it's brand new

for the two hundred
and thirty-fifth time this day,
the taste of freedom

never going stale
in our loud American mouths
singing "Battle Hymn".

But the flag flies not
over all-white faces and
lily-white spirits.

A homogeneous
homeland has never been and never will
be America.

So, what are we when
we pledge allegiance to that
high-flying banner?

We are the dead men.
We are many King Georges
and King Washington.

We are Jefferson,
Madison, Grant, Pickett, Lee,
Jackson, Lincoln, Booth.

We are Hoovervilles,
Reaganomics, Franklin stoves,
and Stonewall's Lost Cause.

We are dead places.
We are Gettysburg, Sumter,
Concord, and Ground Zero.

We are the glory
and the nightmare, all those stars
and stripes forever.

We speak all the tongues
and have invented a few
more along the way.

We are loyal to
everyone and to no one,
but none more than "I".

We love God, we love
GaGa, we love Krishna, and
we love McDonald's.

We worship pizza
and tostones, tamales,
and every bratwurst.

America with
a capital "A", don't wear
it out, thankyasir,

is why and how
I write this. I'll salute our
flag as fireworks

from China fill our
skies with simulated bursts
of flame that made a

Mr. Scott Key think,
"I think America is
being born right now."

Haiku #75: Testimony

2011-07-03T09:17:00.003-06:00

This day, I believe
that Joseph Smith the prophet
translated the plates.

This day, I believe
that Jesus Christ died for all
our sins in this life.

This day, I believe
that the trials we endure
build testimonies

of saving powers
of Him who created us
in His own image.

This day, I know that
I am His daughter, blessed with
the power to know

both of Him and all
things made by His hands on Earth.
I know He loves us.

I know that He cares.
I know that He trusts in us
to choose to return.

Haiku #74: Sunburn

2011-07-01T15:57:00.002-06:00

Toasty red top skin
shows my inability
to not look silly.

Haiku #73: Gastrointestinal Issues

2011-06-12T10:55:00.003-06:00

She got to leave work
early because she ate a
sour pig's foot. No,

"she" does not mean "I",
but a girl I work with who
would eat a pig's foot.

Judge if you will, but
as a "Leaving Work Early"
strategy, it rocked.

Do I plan to try
this porcine nightmare myself?
...maybe at Christmas.

Haiku #72: Jogging It Out

2011-06-04T18:39:00.002-06:00

When your body hurts
from too much bad food or from
too many harsh words,

you can run pain out.
Run the negativity
right out--just like that.

When the fight is with
the pavement--the fight to breathe--
the fight with the world

falls away like sweat.
It runs down your back in drops
and lies forgotten,

a stain on sidewalk.
Only the rattle of air
in your throat is real.

Your mouth may taste blood,
but your eyes might not see red.
They just can't touch you

when you run like this.
When you really run to fly
in to your own pulse.

Sidewalk, shoes, and me.
Feet connect with asphalt and
heart connects with lungs.

Haiku #71: Ahhh-dult

2011-06-03T19:14:00.002-06:00

Being an adult
gets scary when they expect
you to be grown up.

Haiku #70: Basta

2011-05-27T22:54:00.002-06:00

Basta noches con
un corazon callado
y una boca

que no hable las
palabras silencias.
Basta soledad.

Haiku #69: Ice Cream

2011-05-26T21:14:00.002-06:00

Sweet cold creaminess
with Frasier Crane on t.v.
means perfect Thursday.

Haiku #68: Writing

2011-05-24T00:01:00.002-06:00

I am infected
by that disease called writing.
No milk will cure it.

Haiku #67: Mosquito Bites

2011-05-21T22:13:00.003-06:00

Red population
of adobe round houses
on my skin's pueblo.

Great sanguine gods flit
over the desert surface
and land: sacrifice.

Probing the ground-skin,
lifeblood flowing into face,
I am drunk up dry.

All that remain are
the red adobe houses
driving me to tears.

Haiku #66: The Decision to be Happy

2011-05-18T14:52:00.003-06:00

The decision to
be happy is made daily--
why choose to be sad?

The decision to
be happy is made in
unhappy moments.

The decision to
be happy is made when I
talk to God alone.

The decision to
be happy is made each time
I breathe in for air.

The decision to
be happy is one I made
just this afternoon.

You know what happened?
Once I made the decision,
happiness found me.

As simple as it
sounds, it blossomed inside me
like tender green shoots.

I am happy as
I write this. This choice of joy
is worth writing down.

Haiku #65: Scriptures

2011-05-15T23:55:00.004-06:00

"Arise and stand forth,"
an angel said to Alma
one fine day in May.

"Why persecutest
thou the church of God?"
he wanted to know.

Alma became dumb,
so great was the power of
the Lord's ombudsman.

I hardly blame him.
When an angel says what's up,
you're going down hard.

Haiku #64: Chrissy

2011-05-14T14:44:00.002-06:00

Christina BevAnne
Britton feels the heat--what heat?
The heat of my arms.

Strawberries and cake
are the only sustenance
this girl needs to thrive.

Such beautiful songs
as "I Like to Eat" flow forth
from her poet's pen.

Is she a lady
or is she a scholar? I
posit that she's both.

Haiku #63: Cat Nap

2011-05-11T15:03:00.000-06:00

A cat takes eighteen naps
a day. Between my four cats:
seventy two daily naps.

I wonder if cats
ever feel unproductive--
underproductive?

But, then again, a
bath taken wholly by tongue
is very hard work.

Haiku #62: Espanol

2011-05-09T15:17:00.002-06:00

Yo hablo Spanglish.
Si puedo comunicar,
I'm going with it.

Haiku #61: Wind

2011-05-05T13:25:00.003-06:00

Wind whips my skirt as
I walk in the spring sunshine,
constricting my legs.

Hair is a tress nest
that obstructs my vision and
gets inside my mouth.

Green grass lies down flat
and birds veer off course as Earth
exhales more breezes.

The noon light is full,
but the strong gusts are too cold
for the warmth of May.

It is days like this
that give me a mind to fly
a kite I don't have.

Haiku #60: Sundown

2011-05-02T18:31:00.002-06:00

To run through the thick
twilit air as the sun melts
is my Maryland.

Haiku #59: Silence

2011-05-01T19:57:00.002-06:00

Some silence is gold.
Others are because you can't
remember the words.

If I were fearless,
I would speak regardless of
the words that I lack.

I'll try harder to
see the people instead of
my fear of silence.

Haiku #58: Three Days Home

2011-04-28T09:53:00.002-06:00

Day one: got a car!
A gold Focus named Edgar--
it's clever, I swear.

Day two: nephew time!
NPR application
is looking better.

Day three: employment!
Chipotle again, but with
almost two more bucks.

I'd hoped to hit the
ground running, and I seem to
be doing just that.

A Post that Isn't a Haiku!

2011-04-25T15:39:00.007-06:00

Crazy, right?

That said, I figured a recap of the semester/my college education would be much better written not as a haiku. Let's admit it, I'm not a crazy good poet by any means. Once I make it to one hundred poems, I think I'm going to try my hand at something a la Suzan Lori-Parks' 365 Days/365 Plays by writing an incredibly short play a day for one hundred days.

We'll see if that pans out. We all know that my resolve is...well, a touch irresolute at times.

On to the recap!

There is absolutely no question in my mind. My last semester of college trumped every other semester COMBINED. There were some notable drawbacks--Rock n' Chop's absence, being freshly dumped, and Dragon Lady's class--but for the most part, I can't think of any other semester that has been so flawlessly excellent. Let's enumerate a list of some of those high points in no particular order, shall we?

1. Frisbee and Foursquare
+Neon/blacklight foursquare/dance party
+Writing ridiculous emails and making ludicrous announcements at ward prayer
+"Eyyyyy, Foursquare!"

Two. Auto/biography Unchained with Dr. Phil Snyder
+A perfect score on my capstone autobiography
+The desire to continue writing while seeking publication

iii. Hamlet!
+Balloonshop videos
+"Who the FREAK ate my lambas bread!?"
+"The best part of lasagna is you two bein' DEAD!"

D. Brawgs and Chrrrls
+Chrrrl = Chick + Girl
+"CHRRRRRRRRRRRL SQUAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!"
+The sheer lunacy of the competing factions

Cinco. Bananagrams/Scrabble
+Becoming the 2011 Speed Scrabble Champion for the English Department!
+Hours upon HOURS spent playing word games rather than toiling over homework

1 + 5. My Spelling Bee Birthday Party!
+Coming in third in my very first spelling bee
+Training for the larger BYU-wide spelling bee in which I placed fifth
-"Odontalgia"--curse you!

Se7en. 2011 English Symposium
+Presenting my Brit Lit to 1500 term paper
+Putting together a rockin' Powerpoint
+Actually getting some laughs while reading a relatively dry paper

Ate. Relief Society!
+Being a part of the best Relief Society in all of BYU
+Hangin' and looking up to all the members of the presidency
+MAKING PANTS AT THE FERRINS'
+TEMPLE AND CREPE NIGHT!

Zehn. The Leavitts!
+Spending time with a real family in an actual gorgeous house
+Costco. Seriously, Costco.
+Being integrated into one of the most bomb families EVER
+Planning my life as the wife of a man with a sailboat and a wine collection

Rhymes with "Heaven". Skiing!
+Two awesome ward trips to Sundance
+One amazing birthday trip to Wolf Creek with Snootch
+Actually feeling like I can ski

Deacons and Beehives. Sadie Hawkin's Dance
+Matching tie-dye skirt and blazer with Alex!
+Dancing like a maaaaaaniac
+A shout-out to the 177th ward over the mic that resulted in a room EXPLOSION
+Late night foursquare after

I know I'm forgetting about a million great things that happened this semester, but you get the idea. I had a great four months.

Looking back on my college education as a whole, I can't honestly say that the whole thing was fun or that I enjoyed every semester equally. This semester hit the right balance of studies and sociality that I'd been struggling to find every semester previously. However, all told, I'm so astoundingly grateful for the opportunity I had to attend BYU. I wouldn't have traded the last four years for ANYTHING. I'm so much closer to being the person I want to be in every aspect. I've felt myself grow intellectually, emotionally, and, most importantly, spiritually. I know now, more than ever, how much Heavenly Father looks out for His children. It is by His grace and love alone that I had such a tremendously beneficial experience. I am a better daughter, sister, friend, Latter-day Saint, and human being because of the ways my Heavenly Father has nurtured me during my college experience. I am forever indebted to Him for his kindness.

On that note, it's three in the morning and I need to hit the hay. My real life in Maryland begins today and I'm thrilled!

Wish me luck, kiddos. When you check back here, expect a haiku detailing the search for a car :]

Haiku #57: Crêpes

2011-04-22T10:26:00.003-06:00

I am not a crêpe--
nor am I a crêpe person.
Egg taste coats my tongue.

This morning, I ate
crêpes I legitimately
enjoyed. It was strange.

How often do we
actually enjoy things
that we know we won't?

Post-graduation
happiness might explain it--
or the crêpe-eaters.

Either way, Friday
begins with surprise smiles.
They will stay all day.

Haiku #56: Graduation

2011-04-21T09:15:00.003-06:00

Today is the day
I commence. Tomorrow, I
will convocate. Wow.

I am not sure when
this happened, but it seems real.
A diploma? Yeah.

In truth, I'm ready.
School has been good, but I'm done...
for the time being.

Haiku #55: Final Finals

2011-04-18T14:26:00.003-06:00

I have one final
left in my college career:
a portfolio.

I will be back in
Maryland in one week's time.
Time to say goodbye!

I will miss you-taw,
but I will become reuseful
back out in the East.

Haiku #54: Some Black Lights and a Little Neon

2011-04-14T12:18:00.004-06:00

Black light neon four
square was on the docket last
night. Phat dance beats too.

Perhaps what I will
miss most about college is
easy access cool.

The city is built
for my eccentric fun needs.
Not everywhere is.

Haiku #53: Five Reasons Not to Throw a Brick at a Bear's Face

2011-04-13T02:27:00.004-06:00

My haiku tonight
is about a list I made
while thinking of sleep...

1. Bears are notoriously oversensitive.

The bear, disconsolate, will think back through all your interactions leading up to the brick before blowing up your inbox with sadness.

2. Bears are allergic to bricks.

A bear, if struck in the face by something it's allergic to, will become totally unreasonable. It won't even apologize for mauling your mom.

3. Bears refuse to be attacked by anything beginning with the letter B.

If a bear is attacked by a brick, a boatswain, a Burundian, the Bermuda Triangle, or Bette Midler, its rage can consume twelve city blocks.

4. Bears turn into Wolverine when angered.

If you thought a bear was bad with claws and a nasty 'tude, just wait until its skeleton gets coated in adamantium.

5. A bear's prerogative is to kill you anyway.

Why give it a reason to do what it's hankering to do anyway? The bear was probably giving you an easy shot just to justify its rampage.

Haiku #52: Shoes

2011-04-11T10:58:00.004-06:00

I need some new shoes.
The cute ones I've been wearing
are run down and gross.

Unfortunately,
I have to buy my own shoes
from this point onward.

Getting a job for
shoe money sounds unpleasant,
but that's how it is.

Haiku #51: Saturday...

2011-04-10T01:09:00.003-06:00

...morning was the best.
OP's bridal shower was
total perfection.

Grandma and I planned
games, got food, and helped to host.
We did a great job.

...afternoon was the best.
I divyed up assignments
for our pizza night,

ate Cafe Rio,
did my grocery shopping,
and rocked tie dye skirt.

...night was the BEST.
Sadie Hawkin's dance with my
date's matching blazer.

Pizza before the
dance, Bananagrams, and then--
the best dance ever.

My ward is so great.
I announced late night four square--
the room exploded.

Such a ballin' day.
Everything was simply great.
Please envy my life.

Haiku #50: Creepin'

2011-04-08T14:26:00.003-06:00

John Foster Russell
is creepin' on me in the
library. Whoa, man.

I think he should keep
his eyes on his computer,
not mine. What a creep.

Haiku #49: Shades

2011-04-06T14:54:00.003-06:00

I don't know why my
hair has been so dark lately.
I miss the lightness.

Solution: lots of
outdoor sun time this summer.
The red will appear!

Conversely, I do
know why my skin has been so
white lately: no tan.

Just another thing
lots of tennis, swimming, and
camp will have to fix!

Haiku #48: Melancholy

2011-04-04T19:24:00.002-06:00

Why do "Monday" and
"melancholy" start with the
same letter? What gives?

It's been a day, folks.
Mondays might not be so bad
if they weren't first up.

Elaboration
won't happen here. Here's hoping
Tuesday wins the day.

Haiku #47: The King's Speech

2011-04-03T02:01:00.002-06:00

Rarely do I feel
so very touched by a film.
Outstanding, indeed.

Haiku #46: Autobiography

2011-03-28T11:38:00.002-06:00

To write oneself is
to write a fiction with the
face in the mirror.

It masquerades as
the life you have been living,
but much shinier.

My life isn't so
poetic. I'm not polished.
I'm not four chapters.

But, there it will be:
my storyline, my opus.
My life in key strokes.

Haiku #45: International Techno Jams

2011-03-26T15:14:00.003-06:00

I love my Techno
as incomprehensible
as studying in

the library on
a Saturday--meaning
a whole barrel full.

Also, indexing
party that I helped to plan
was simply perfect.

Haiku #44: Symposium

2011-03-25T16:24:00.004-06:00

Remember two months
ago when I found out that
I would be reading

my paper at the
English Symposium this
year? I just did that.

Surprisingly, it
was very well received. It
even got some laughs.

Some of my friends came
to listen. They are too nice.
I love feeling smart.

Haiku #43: Bagpipes

2011-03-25T00:01:00.003-06:00

I don't know if I
ever focus more when I
study than when I

listen to bagpipes.
There's resonance in their sound
that makes me feel whole.

Melodramatic?
No. It's just one of those things
I can't quite describe.

Haiku #42: Beatles

2011-03-21T22:21:00.002-06:00

Sheepdog standing in
the rain, bullfrog doing it
again. Mmm, good stuff.

Haiku #41: Friendship

2011-03-20T02:48:00.003-06:00

To me, having friends
is the feeling of warm sheets
straight from the dryer,

broken-in blue jeans,
wool gloves on cold hands at dawn,
sun-warmed grass in June,

big feather pillows,
old rocking chairs on porches,
serving all aces,

and smiling too big
in a simultaneous
blink of silent joy.

Haiku #40: Friday

2011-03-18T12:27:00.005-06:00

Friday comes after
Thursday, before Saturday
and Sunday. Days of

the week can be so
tricky that way. Thank goodness
for Rebecca Black.

Without her, how would
the prepubescents know when
to go and party?

Answer: they wouldn't.
Let the fifteen-year-old drive.
That's a good idea!

Haiku #39: Speed Scrabble Tournament

2011-03-15T23:29:00.003-06:00

Hey all, here's the thing:
English Department glory
was secured tonight.

After three months of
practice, my geekiness for
words paid off big time.

Haiku #38: Podcasts

2011-03-14T12:41:00.004-06:00

Short stories read by
famous actors every week
are just my favorite.

This American
Life comes in a close second.
Ira Glass is bomb.

I love NPR.
Pretentious radio is
just how I roll, Holmes.

Haiku #37: Ballroom Dance Lessons

2011-03-12T11:09:00.002-07:00

Two, three, cha cha cha.
I am all shoulders, no hips.
Two, three, cha cha cha.

Two, three, cha cha cha.
Boys shouldn't be scared to lead.
Two, three, cha cha cha.

Two, three, cha cha cha.
Doesn't four come after three?
Two, three, cha cha cha.

Two, three, cha cha cha.
I think I will stick to swing.
Two, three, cha cha cha...

Haiku #36: Spring Weather

2011-03-10T14:30:00.003-07:00

Go outside. Right now.
The sun is smiling so wide,
it might split the sky.

While I was looking
forward to one more ski trip,
I'll embrace springtime.

If possible, I
would date, court, and then marry
the glory outside.

I wish I could go
revel in it. I want to
break up with homework.

Haiku #35: Half Something

2011-03-09T00:16:00.003-07:00

My glass is empty,
but I'm still thirsty. Please fill it.
I'm too tired to.

Take it easy, kids.
This isn't a metaphor.
I'm just way thirsty.

Haiku #34: Birthday

2011-03-04T14:06:00.002-07:00

I turn twenty two
on the morrow. When on Earth
did I get so big?

I will be skiing
with Snootch to celebrate my
oldening. Hooray!

Haiku #33: Jello Wrestling

2011-03-02T12:30:00.003-07:00

July Jell-o fights
are sticky and full of dirt.
Memories are priceless.

Haiku #32: Iceland

2011-02-23T12:13:00.002-07:00

IcelandAir charges
less than $700 from
DC to Iceland.

I don't really want
to go to Iceland, but I
could once I have work.

Weird, huh? I could go
anywhere. My mind is blown.
The world has opened.

Haiku #31: Four Square

2011-02-22T15:55:00.003-07:00

We played Four Square last
night. My right hand is sore, but
my inner kid smiles.

When real life looms up
ahead, telling you to grow up,
sometimes good games help.

Haiku #30: Sabbath

2011-02-20T14:06:00.002-07:00

I feel a stillness
on Sundays that is absent
all the other days.

It is a lightness,
a rejuvenation of
spirit. Utter calm.

I am grateful for
the hubbub of other days,
but today, I rest.

Haiku #29: Rain

2011-02-19T13:14:00.004-07:00

It is raining on
the roof and I hear myself
thinking. It's quiet.

What is it about
the rain that makes us all so
pensive? I vote "Clouds."

I want to be home
with some curry and a book,
but alas. I'm not.

On a brighter note,
this photograph is helping
a ton. Thanks, parents :]

Haiku #28: Curry

2011-02-18T14:30:00.002-07:00

I'm making curry
tonight over hot jasmine
rice. Life is perfect!

Haiku #27: Curly Fries

2011-02-17T14:35:00.002-07:00

Vices plague us all.
My vice: fried potato snacks.
Curly fries are best.

I never feel great
after partaking of them,
but my love is fierce.

As it happens, my
love is stronger than my guilt.
I'm PotatoFace.

Haiku #26: Snow

2011-02-16T22:45:00.002-07:00

Despite the hindrance
to my plans, snow is lovely.
A cleansing blanket.

Haiku #25: Womanist Preclusion

2011-02-14T12:24:00.003-07:00

Blackness isn't me.
Female is, but blackness isn't.
You exclude me there.

Men and women may
be equal, but not the same.
What is a woman?

Does my whiteness blind
me so much that I can't see?
Am I not woman?

Principal theories
say there's no "-ism" for me.
My voice: undefined.

Am I less valid?
Is my label-lack silent?
What woman am I?

I'm probably a
touch dramatic. After all,
whiteness is giant.

Haiku #24: Bad Poetry

2011-02-13T00:48:00.004-07:00

Bad Poetry night
at The Parlor. Second place!
My poem was awful.

So awful, I think
I'll share it with you so you
can see for yourself:

Romantic Rhyming Remains Obfuscated

Roses are red,
violets are blue,
Your heart is made of polyethylene teraphylate
Which, btw, is a plastic used in making soda bottles that, when dumped into bodies of water, causes sex changes in fish.
(Enjoy a torso full of mutant fish babies)

Roses are red,
violets are orange,
if a train left St. Paul at five o’clock going 75 miles an hour due east
and another train left Buffalo at 4:30 going 85 miles an hour due west
and you decided to take a nap right at the intersection where the two proverbial trains from the high school math problem were going to collide,
I wouldn’t even send a carrier pigeon to tell you that you were about to become a pancake.

Roses are red,
violets are only partially green,
and I think you might be a robot.
(You know, because only a man with a heart made of tungsten would let a peach like me get away)

Roses are red,
violets are probably more purple than blue,
You know what happened when you were busy self-absorbing?
Mubarak stepped down and ushered democracy into Egypt. No big.

Roses are red,
Violets are meat-colored.
I made you dinner how many times
And you still ended up acting like Jamaican chicken?

Roses are red,
and sometimes they’re yellow.
If a bad poem is recited in an empty room,
Is it still a bad poem?

Haiku #23: Stasis

2011-02-10T14:46:00.002-07:00

I read books a lot.
While this makes a good student,
it gets lonesome too.

Haiku #22: Hey, That Rhymed!

2011-02-08T00:42:00.003-07:00

This summer, two bees
reproduced on my glasses.
I felt invasive.

Saturday skiing!
Rushing down the mountain felt
like flying sans wings.

Who needs wings when you
have the fierce joy of living
and full consciousness?

Haiku #21: Being Awesome

2011-02-03T13:44:00.003-07:00

My paper was picked
to be read at the English
Symposium. Word.

My resume is
starting to get so ripped, it
should take a pee test.

That was a steroid
joke. I hope you weren't wildly
upset. I don't do drugs.

If I did do drugs,
I wouldn't have such a sweet
resume, would I?

Haiku #20: Russell Crowe

2011-02-02T00:32:00.003-07:00

Robin Hood last night.
Master and Commander hoy.
Lots of Mister Crowe.

I am excited
for the Oscars in a month.
We will totes party.

As for other news,
I've been getting back into
NPR—culture!

Knowing about the
world around me links me in.
I exist guilt-light.

Haiku #19: Martha

2011-01-28T14:19:00.002-07:00

Martha said my blog
today should be about a
gurney. Yeah, she did.

I don't know too much
about gurneys. Should I though?
No—I'm not dead yet.

Haiku #18: Compliments

2011-01-26T00:39:00.003-07:00

To compliment boys
is a good idea because
they can be nice back.

No one get freaked out.
There's not one I'm thinking of.
I just observe things.

Haiku #17: Bananagrams

2011-01-24T01:02:00.003-07:00

The tiles come in
a 'nana-shaped yellow bag.
It holds my heartbrain.

Like Scrabble, but fast
and no point competition.
You just win or lose.

I like my word games
because my mind is working
when I take a break.

Also, Peter Pan
will be over in one week.
I will go skiing.

Haiku #16: Snuggle Sack

2011-01-20T00:42:00.002-07:00

My pajamas are
mind-meltingly comfortable.
My brain is now soup.

They are just a bag
with holes for head, hands, and feet.
I'm a potato.

When I see the two
last words from the first stanzas,
I am spoon hunter.

Haiku #15: Zombies

2011-01-17T00:34:00.004-07:00

I had a nightmare:
the Zombie Apocalypse.
Terrification.

Haiku #14: Scrabble

2011-01-14T14:46:00.004-07:00

Words can never tell
why I love Scrabble so well.
Did you like that rhyme?

Describing my love
shouldn't be too hard--for I'm
a logophile, yo.

Haiku #13: Tired

2011-01-13T17:01:00.003-07:00

Coming up on day
three of follow spot tech week.
Tired when awake.

Enjoying the semester.
I have all kinds of Scrabble.
Three dates to play soon!

I don't read Shakespeare
like anyone else in class.
I am smart? Stupid?

I wish my bagpipes
were already in my life.
One more semester.

Haiku #12: Socializing

2011-01-10T00:46:00.003-07:00

I like to talk to
people. They like to talk to
me too. Funny, huh?

My apartment is
wicked popular. We try
awesomeness always.

In other news, new
roommate Hamlet is too cute.
Not even Danish!

Haiku #11: Cookies

2011-01-09T01:12:00.003-07:00

I don't often want
cookies as badly as I
have all through this week.

I thought, "Perhaps I've
been impregnated by snow."
I don't think that works.

Haiku #10: Real Life

2011-01-06T22:51:00.004-07:00

I was productive
this afternoon. I went to
the post office, and

I paid my rent, and
I paid the utilities,
and I directed.

I prefer to have
such full days so I can look
back and feel grown up.

Haiku #9: Last First Day

2011-01-05T00:52:00.003-07:00

Walking past your building
brought more unhappy twinges
than I really want.

Otherwise, first day
was Shakespeare and Editing
AND MARIO KART.

I don't like being
so cold, but I do enjoy
the chills of learning.

Now, my contacts burn.
I'm taking them out lest my
eyes turn to jelly.

Haiku #8: Adios, Maryland

2011-01-02T23:00:00.003-07:00

In twelve-ish hours,
I will have boarded a jet.
Provo awaits me.

This break has been hard,
but it will be worse to leave
my chucklemonkeys.

When I return from
Utah this time, I will have
my diploma. Snap.

Haiku #7: Almost Time

2011-01-01T11:27:00.006-07:00

P-Town looms in sight.
I will go to Ikea--
Grandma wants a lamp.

Three days in the car.
Temples glitter in winter.
Sarah is married!

Almost twenty four
hours of sleep needed to
recoup what was lost.

Almost four hundred
dollars later, I think I
am ready for school.

Twenty eleven
will be a lot of good things
that twenty ten wasn't.

But twenty ten was
still important. It will be
remembered fondly.

Haiku #6: Naps

2010-12-29T15:56:00.005-07:00

I believe I have
taken five cat naps today.
Cats sure are sleepy.

If dying is like
falling asleep, then I think
I'm great at dying.

Perhaps that's not right,
as the naps were all taken
at a funeral.

Haiku #5: Storyville

2010-12-28T15:12:00.004-07:00

Trips to Storyville
should have happened more when the
summer wasn't dead!

I was a monkey,
Mama Bear, a spastic goat.
"Fox in Socks" doth suck.

Haiku #4: Passive Participant

2010-12-27T10:30:00.004-07:00

Sledding can't happen
on one inch of melting snow.
This is a bummer.

However, "Tangled"
is on the docket today.
What a nice upturn!

I need to buy books,
for my final semester
looms...one week away.

Haiku #3: Sick

2010-12-26T12:10:00.003-07:00

As the snow comes down,
my laborious breathing
reminds me I'm ill.

Haiku #2: Christmas

2010-12-25T01:21:00.003-07:00

A miracle birth,
Christ came down to save us all.
Sing "Happy Birthday".

Born and died for us,
His gifts always mean the most
when we love Him back.

Despite the heartsick,
I have a loving family.
I am greatly blessed.

Haiku #1: An Easier Way to Blog Daily

2010-12-24T01:01:00.004-07:00

To blog every day,
I will compose one haiku.
Maybe two or three.

This way, there's less stress
because of long term absence.
I will feel better.

Today's thoughts: Grayson.
He turned six on the 21st.
Man, I am old now.

Medieval Times had
our backs for dinner tonight.
Jousting is violent.

However, nephews'
awe over swordplay was nice.
I received a "rose".

Here's hoping this works.
I ought to write here daily.
You sometimes read this.

My Political Rant in Four Seconds

2010-11-05T09:35:00.005-06:00

No, it will not actually be a rant.

I merely wanted to say that my least favorite aspect of politics isn't corporate money lending, Senate corruption, inequality, the "separation" of Church and State, or any of the other wholesale labels people love to kick around during election time. My least favorite aspect of the political process is how personally incensed people my age get when their candidate doesn't win. Come on, guys. We know nothing about politics. You're just getting loud because this is the second (probably first) election you've been legally allowed to take part in. Try growing up a bit.

That, and because college age students are one of the least represented demographics in the polls, instead of channeling all your rage onto Facebook where you just look like one of those boisterous baboons I mentioned earlier, try doing something constructive like getting all your equally ignorant college age friends to the polls with you. Honestly, you don't have anything to complain about if you're not even proactive enough to try and enact a change for what you perceive to be "better".

Ok, so maybe this was a little bit of a rant. But, hey, at least it was short :]

Ladies and Gentlemen! Your Attention, Please!

2010-10-14T16:02:00.006-06:00

I really hate to do this, so I promise right now to never use this blog for personal gain ever again! That being said, if anyone out there is still reading, I could sure use your help with something.

If you'll direct your attention to the picture of the happy couple in the last post, you'll think to yourself, "Wow, what a great couple! They sure desire a really nice night out some time!" Well, you can give us that! I've entered a story on "Best and Worst Dates at BYU"--a dating blog recently created for someone's class. The story is full of love, adventure, Belgians riding on the backs of dragons--

or giant Scrabble. I find that equally exciting.

Anyway, I now ask YOU, my readers, to help me get my story voted "The Best Date," which makes me eligible to win a gift card for a great date at either some fancy shmancy restaurant or a building full of trampolines or just something else FUN! Here's all you have to do:

Step 1: Go to the blog, where you will find my wonderfully wonderful story. Here's the url: bestandworstdatesatbyu.blogspot.com. KTHX.

Step 2: Go to the poll on the right side of the page.

Step 3: Vote for story "G" under the best dates column.

Step 4: Watch me win!

If you'd like to read my story, simply search for "Scrabble" in the search bar at the top of the blog. It's a good story, I promise.

If you have 30 seconds to read this blog, then you have 30 seconds to vote! I'd really appreciate it if anyone who reads this could put in their vote--my little heart just might explode!

Think it over! It'll be great!

P.S. In case anyone was wondering, we totally won :D

Michael

2010-10-07T02:03:00.004-06:00

Yeah. We're pretty great together <3

Surveys for the Weary Brain :]

2010-09-29T09:21:00.003-06:00

What makes you purely happy?

*Family vacations
*Silly and serious times with roommates
*Dates with Michael
*Sunday night Scrabble
*A's on papers
*Knowing a prayer has been answered

Where do you feel "home"?

*My parents' house
*My sister and brother's houses
*My apartment (or really, wherever my roommates are)
*Jamie's house
*The basement of the JFSB :p

What are your obsessions?

*Reading when I don't have time to do it
*Making movies for people to enjoy
*Techno to dance to
*Harry Potter trivia
*International films
*Creative writing
*Salty snacks
*Laughing/Smiling

What are your "guilty pleasures"?

*Being awake when the rest of the house is asleep
*Fighting video games
*Taking pictures of myself, then deleting them right away
*The High School Musical soundtrack
*Congratulating myself when I get answers right in class

What are signature things about you?

*An orange and white polka dotted seat cover that I wear as a hat
*Lab goggles as a necklace
*A button from my fan club on my purse
*Walking into trees as I'm sending a text message
*Using words like "phallocentric"
*Smiling just because I look serious when I'm not

This is fun! Let me learn more about you!

ATTACK OF THE CRUNK

2010-08-12T13:37:00.010-06:00

A funny thing happened to me last night around three. As I'm wont to do in the summertime, I was up far too late--one could blame the lack of responsibility/a less than bustling social calender for this, but I like to think that my penchant for nocturnal activity just adds to my abundantly quirky charm--which was, of course, impairing my thinking a degree or two.

As I'm also wont to do during my nighttime perusals, I was aimlessly surfing Facebook as if expecting everyone else to be awake and posting things for my entertainment. Just as I was about to throw in the towel and crawl into bed, I noticed that my friend had posted a video of a rock cover of Lady GaGa's "Bad Romance". Combining my late night curiosity with my ardent love for GaGa, I listened to a few seconds of it. If you're curious about what this matrimony of musical stylings would produce, you can watch the video.

While I thought the instrumentals were really cool, I was deeply underwhelmed by the singer's inability to match GaGa's vocal caliber of mind melting excellence/intense weirdness strong enough to melt all the babies in a small village in the middle of Somalia. I let my friend know of my disappointment forthwith:

Deliriously Tired Genevieve: "Eh. That girl doesn't have nearly the vocals that GaGa cranks out, but an interesting cover anyway."

This is where things got interesting. My friend, who was mysteriously much more lucid at this point in the morning than myself, responded:

Mysteriously Alert Friend: "Something about the deepness of Gaga's voice during the verses makes me saaad. I do love the chorus for the original Bad Romance though. I'm more about the melody than the crunk."

Let me preface the audacity of my next comment by saying that I understand exactly what she meant by "the crunk". I was totally with it at this point.

HOWEVER--

the first thing that came to mind when I read "the crunk" was a terrifyingly sharp polygon walking down the street whilst punching people in the face. It looked a little something like this:

See? Doesn't that thing exude the essence of what a crunk really is? Don't you think that thing rolls into all the clubs when everyone starts to actually get crunk? At that point, everyone is so inebriated that I'm sure it doesn't even come as a shock when a gigantic red pointy destruction machine gets up in their grills and starts knocking the drunk daylights out of them!

So, really, that's the end of the story--

unless you count the part where I found $5.

Horn Tooting

2010-07-21T00:05:00.005-06:00

Although I'm trying not to, you understand.

However, because this is a record for my posterity, I think I should record this.

A fan club in my honor was created today. This is not the first time for this to happen, but this is certainly the best.

The first time, my friends made t-shirts to indicate the existence of a Genny Busch fan club.

The second time, a Facebook group was created for the expression of adulation when thinking about me.

The third time--meaning this time--another Facebook group was created--and buttons were made. Yes, Blogosphere, buttons.

See?

In order to stave off any potential bigheadedness, I've begun to tell myself that God blesses me with wonderful friends who love me to tide me over as I continue to look for a young man to love. But, in the mean time, these are some pretty swanky buttons...

OVER AND OUT!

Self-Affirmations are Great!

2010-06-30T22:16:00.004-06:00

But, before we get to me saying nice things about myself (which isn't a bad thing after you've had a day like today), I'd like to address something that I thought was awfully neat:

I was slogging through radionic refuse whilst driving around town trying to find my newspapers today, and as is to be expected this summer, I ran into both "Your Love Is My Drug" by Ke$ha and "California Girls" by Katy Perry. Thinking about how unavoidable these awful tunes are, I also began to think about how both Ke$ha (I won't lie, I just really like typing her name) and Katy Perry both had better hits than these on the radio at one point. Then, as if by magic, I came across "Tik Tok"--the better Ke$ha song in question. Immediately after, I came across "Hot N' Cold"--the better Katy Perry song in question. Is that goofy or what?

Anyway, I've decided that some self-affirmations are in order because I've been pretty down on myself today for one reason or another. However, chatting with multiple friends and a particularly caring sister have helped me to put into perspective some of the issues at hand so that they seem much more manageable. Thanks, ladies!

That being said, I shall now enumerate a list of ten things I really like about myself!

Ten Things I Really Like About Myself

1. I really like my large vocabulary. I figure that I became a selective listener because so many people use the same words to say the same things over and over and over again, and that's pretty boring if you ask me. In order to differentiate my words from everyone else's words, I just use longer and prettier words. Call me condescending, but I'm reluctant to let my loquacious practices fill me with chagrin :]

2. I really like my bagpiping aspirations. When I was thirteen, I asked my parents for a set of bagpipes, which was appropriately met with skepticism. When do thirteen-year-olds ever stick with anything, right? However, six years later, I asked my parents again for bagpipes, which prompted the purchase of a chanter and the quest for a teacher. It has been almost two years since I received said chanter in the mail, and I'm SO excited to march in parades one day in a pipe band!

3. I really like what I've done with my bedroom. While it looks like a sixteen-year-old girl exploded inside it (that really is what happened), its walls hold hundreds of memories that I can look back on in my declining years. Whether it's a hospital visitor's pass from the day my nephew Thatcher was born or one of myriad Pocky boxes, each item on my walls means something special and specific. I like to think of it as "explosive scrapbooking."

4. I really like my love of singing in the car. I always look so forward to coming home to Maryland from Utah because I know I'll have a car to blast the radio in. Regardless of the destination, every time I drive anywhere, the radio comes on, and I end up singing along to the first jam I can find. People give me incredulous looks like they've never even heard of singing in the car before, but I know they just wish they were in my passenger seat singing the harmonies.

5. I really like my spontaneity. Part of me needs structure all the time, but most of the time, I'm prone to go along with the first fun plan I hear about. The beauty of college is being flexible enough to pick up at a moment's notice to climb a mountain, prank someone's roommates, or run to the next city for ice cream. I've found that I've struck a beautiful balance between enough structure for productivity and enough devil-may-care-itude for adventures. Hence my extremely interesting life.

6. I really like my movies. More often than not, a bad day can be rectified by looking at any of the movies I made freshman year when I should have been doing homework. While they're not cinematic masterpieces by any stretch of the cerebellum, they remind of times when anything set my imagination off--a pine cone, an umbrella, a shoelace. Once upon a time, a camera came much more readily to my hand than it does now, and that makes me a little sad. However, the 40+ movies on my Facebook page usually get me out of that funk right quick.

7. I really like my ability to pick awesome friends. While some of my high school friends were pretty suspicious characters, I've since come in contact with some really fantastic people. While this may very well be less of me picking winners and more of God putting people in my path that I need to meet, I still love that I've made myself a person that sustains those important friendships rather than letting them fizzle out. I also really love that I have spectacular family, but that's a whole other blog entry altogether :]

8. I really like that I'm tidy. College is a place in which many people discover just how much their mothers cleaned up after them. Instead of discovering how many messes I got cleaned up for me, I discovered how much of an impact my mother had on me by watching myself spring into action whenever a mess appeared. I have a very hard time leaving a dirty house in the morning, and I'm glad that I'm learning stellar cleanliness now so that I can be a bombtastic homemaker one day.

9. I really like that I'm learning greater reliance on the Lord. I'm the most bullheaded person I know, which makes it extraordinarily difficult for me to ask for any serious help. However, I quickly learned after being out at school for a while that while you can certainly do a lot for yourself physically that everyone needs the Lord for help spiritually. I came to understand that humbling yourself and calling upon Him is strength rather than weakness, and that He will never, under any circumstances, let us down. I can feel greater inner peace because of my increased reliance on His steady arm over the fallible arm of flesh.

10. I really love that I am a daughter of God, and that I know my divine lineage. I love that my Heavenly Father not only created this astoundingly wonderful world for us all to live in, but also that He planned to give us that same creative power one day. I love knowing that He loves me, and that He sent His son to die for my sins. I love feeling the power of His love every day as I pray, read my scriptures, and serve others. I love having a light in the darkness that threatens to engulf me every day of my life. I love knowing of the faith that my Father has in me.

Ok, enough about me. What about you lovely people? What are some things you really like about yourselves? By all means, share them here!

Whoa!

2010-04-26T13:59:00.003-06:00

Where did a month go?! Honestly, it's like I've fallen off the face of the Blogosphere. Ardent apologies are in order, my dear readers. I hope to be more consistent with updating all five of you on my life.

Ok, well, I don't particularly feel like writing about uber-loads of paragraphs, so I'm going to enumerate a list instead:

I finished Winter semester! After a very grueling four months, many books and papers, and a pretty chill/intense Finals Week, I've come through very relieved to be alive. I now have eight weeks of Spring term to look forward to. I'm taking 8 (technically 9) credits, which translates into three classes and working on a show. I'll be very busy as I try to still have fun in the sunshine. If I manage to survive this term and make it home on June 19th in one piece, it will be the greatest miracle since Moses parted the Red Sea.
Grandma, Rock n' Chop, E-Slice, and Captain Choke-You-To-Death moved out :[ Fortunately, OP is hanging around for Spring/Summer, so I still have one of my best buddies to have springtime fun with. In exchange for our four beloved roomies, we gained a few neighbors--E-Slice (Elise), Little Chicken (Sarah), and Sister (Theresa). We're already really enjoying them living here, and they seem to like our sweet action apartment.
After being released from my favorite calling to date (Gospel Doctrine Teaching), I thought I could coast through this term with something easier like being on the Friendship Council. As is to be expected when such things are hoped for, I was called to be the co-chair of the Gospel Teaching and Leadership Council. Now, instead of just being a Sunday School teacher, I'm over ALL the Sunday School teachers. While I'm nervous about co-directing the program, I'm excited for the opportunity to serve and help the members of the ward better learn the gospel.
I got a new computer! My old computer final came up with a problem I couldn't solve with rebooting the system and getting a better antivirus. For some reason, the energy cord won't talk to the battery, so it will no longer charge. That being said, I love my new computer! It's one of the little Acer notebooks, which we affectionately named Little Red (which works with Grandma's Big Blue). It's so nice to have a personal computer so that I'm not dependent upon school computers for everything.
This Saturday and Sunday, I went on a road trip to Idaho with my roommates OP and Rock n' Chop to go to a wedding reception and to meet up with Rock n' Chop's parents so she could go home. Plus, I didn't think OP driving home alone sounded very fun or safe, so I decided that I was up for some adventure. Saturday was way fun--loud fun music, hyperactive us, warm sunshine. What could be better, right? The wedding reception was for their friend from last year, who I didn't know, so it was fun for them to visit. Plus, there was BANGIN' food, so I definitely made good on this deal. After that, we met up with OP's friend to play Wallyball, which is what happens when Racquetball and Volleyball get together and have a baby. Then, it was time to bring Rock n' Chop to meet up with her family at the hotel. Fortunately, we got hang out for another half hour before a sad goodbye for the summer. We love that kid!
OP and I spent the night in her friend's apartment. Because we wanted to make it back in time for church, we left at about eight the next morning--after roughly five hours of sleep. It was a LONG drive, but we had fun all the same. We arrived safely back in Provo after driving for exactly four hours. It was straight money and an overall very successful trip.

I think that's enough updating for now. I start classes on Wednesday, so we'll see if I'm still alive enough to write some more before June. Happy Monday!

Grandma

2010-03-25T13:32:00.002-06:00

I received a call from my mom at 8:12 this morning. Between three and four o'clock this morning, my grandma Lorraine died.

It's not as if we didn't expect this. After all, she was 90 years old and had been in declining health for about a decade. We were all pretty amazed she'd made it this long. Her death was a release from the great deal of pain she'd been in since she fell and broke her hip two months ago.

But, that doesn't make it any less sad, you know? I know that she's much happier now than she was living in a painkiller haze and that she's now in the care of Heavenly Father. I know about families being sealed for eternity, but that doesn't take the sadness out of the immediate moment of living. I'll see her again, but she's gone now.

As hard as it is to admit it, the thing I'm most remorseful about is exactly what my mom said I'd be sad about when this happened: wasted opportunities. I went to go see her in the assisted living center, but rarely with a good attitude. I would go once a week, but I could have gone much more. I would stay for 45 minutes, an hour, but I could have stayed two or three. I would talk about myself, but I could have asked so many more questions about her.

Hindsight being 20/20 never quite makes you feel as bad as it does when death is involved.

I know I can't beat myself up. I have to acknowledge the opportunities I did take to spend time with her, to get to know her before she passed away. I won't be languishing over this for long, but in the immediate aftermath, it's just an upsetting reality to come to terms with.

If blogging seemed like an absolutely inappropriate response to the death of a loved one, then I apologize for any ruffled sensibilities that resulted from reading this post. I have a hard time getting my feelings out in spoken words, so I need this written medium to express myself.

Have a nice day, all.

The Birthday Post/100th Post

2010-03-05T12:42:00.003-07:00

Wow--that worked out crazily well. I think the monumental 100th blog post should land on something equally momentous. In my case, it's the last monumental birthday before I turn 30, so this worked out well. Maybe on my 30th birthday, I'll be to like my 1,000th blog post.

CROSS YOUR FINGERS.

So, technically, my 21st birthday is not yet in full swing. It will officially be partiful at 5 o'clock this afternoon. However, I figured that since my birthday has been marvelous up to this point that I could blog about it anyway.

First and foremost, my dear brother Snootch and his lovely wife had their second baby yesterday! Porter John Busch was born on March 4th, 2010. Ordinarily, I'd also divulge the length and weight of the child in question, but I am currently bereft of these important specifics. However, come tomorrow afternoon, I will be meeting this beautiful baby boy, so I'm not too cut up about not knowing how big the little guy is at present.

Secondly, as of yesterday, my show is over! I didn't blog too extensively about it, but I was in a neofuturist show called "Too Much Light Makes The Baby Go Blind" (aka 15 plays in 30 minutes). The completion of it is both happy and sad, but mostly happy. I've just been so tired and spread thin with rehearsals that it was time for it to be done. However, all the friends I've made and the good times we had with Winthrop the Orange will be dearly missed. Our three performances yesterday went thunderously well--mostly because so many of my friends came to support me. There was mirth, despair, curiosity, confusion, and a couple of obnoxious dorks who thought they were part of the show (they weren't), which somehow justified them talking very loudly the entire time. But, aside from that, I feel like it was received very well. Video soon maybe?

Ok, now we fast forward to my birthday. At midnight, Grandma and I went with some costume shop kiddos to the premiere of "Alice in Wonderland". Despite both of us having early classes today, we decided that birthdays deserve frivolity--that, and we're both sort of old ladies anyway, so we're trying to live up our youth before we really are too old to do anything but stare at the wall. I didn't really go in with any expectations--I knew nothing about it until last night--which is always good because no expectations = no disappointment.

The "Tim Burtonness" of it all was impressive, as per usual. The 3D was done very well and I feel like it added a dimension to the story that may not have come across as strongly in those standard two dimensions (haha, that sounded dumb, but you know that's not how I meant it). The CG was also very good, which made it a lot easier to follow certain characters like Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum around. That, and the Jabberwocky was straight up awesome. On the downside, Helena Bonham Carter's disturbingly enhanced noggin detracted considerably from her loveliness, which was sad. However, the commentary made on said huge head was interesting, so I'd be reticent to actually complain.

However, this is where we realize that the dream was too good to be true--I do need to do some complaining. If you don't really want to have the movie spoiled for you, I'd skip down a paragraph. My biggest issue with the film is the lack of character development in Alice. 75% of the movie was her lolling around, refusing to accept that Wonderland was real and that she was playing an integral part in the unfolding of history. However, in one magical moment with the caterpillar (which was the same moment she'd had with the Alan Rickman caterpillar two times earlier in the movie), she suddenly has the "Heroine-Making Turn" and she becomes all confident and assertive, blah blah blah. I realize that this is a common device used in movie plot lines because charting the actual hero's journey is a LOOONG process that 21st audiences simply will not sit through happily. I also realize that under duress, it is possible to call on previously unknown inner strength which can spur you into heroics. But by making this choice, I became confused about which audience is supposed to buy this. This movie is certainly not made for children--lots of eye gouging and scary creatures--yet such moral polarity and rapidity of change in character isn't something that adults will look at and learn things from. Who was Timmy trying to target?

Ok, overthinking complete. The point is, I had a really good time last night and I'm super glad my birthday started off on such a fun note. After rolling into bed at about 2:15, I woke up at 8:15-ish to discover a lovely bright notecard on top of my phone. It bore birthday greetings from Grandma, which was so nice to wake up to. Upon going through my morning routine, I found other such notes from my roommates OP and Rock n' Chop. Needless to say, my morning was made and I'm so glad I get to live with these wonderful girls next year.

But, wait, there's more--when I finally rolled up to class 10 minutes late (I hadn't realized my birthday would be full of lurvely snow), my friend Bananas dropped a parcel onto my desk. It was a bundle of neon notecards bearing birthday greetings from a bunch a people from the ward. I'm not 100% who coordinated this effort, but I was so touched. It's been such a nice buoy throughout this cold and rather bleary Friday (I'm crazy tired).

Tonight, the birthday goodness keeps on coming. I'm going to see "Slumdog Millionaire" in the International Cinema (finally!) with some of my lovely friends, after which there will be a soiree (there should be accent on one of those e-s) involving cake and other birthdaylike things.

Tomorrow, I'm heading up to Roy to see Porter and Co. I can't wait to meet this kid! Then, on Sunday, my neighbor and I are throwing a joint Oscar costume party to commemorate my favorite night of television. I'm going as one of the Na'vi, which isn't racist--blue face is perfectly acceptable, thank you very much.

Alright, this is far longer than necessary, so I'll leave off here. Happy Friday!

Quesadillas at the Blue Line

2010-02-25T16:38:00.005-07:00

Do you ever come across an amazing food that needs to be shared with the world? I had one such discovery today that needs to be broadcast to all the people that eat food across the Blogosphere.

To begin my story, I have to pose the question: has anyone else been craving chicken nuggets and diet Coke HARDXCORE ever since the Olympics started? When every other commercial aired is attractive Nordic skiers eating delicious Mac-diddy's nuggets or shiny silver cans of non-fattening Coke with big happy hearts on them, how can I even think about anything else?

Anyway, this story begins with one such commercial. I had seen about 7,000 of these nugget commercials in the past week, so I decided that today was going to be the day that I made the 15 minute walk west of campus to the McDonald's in order to satisfy my need for the golden "pieces of heaven" (the display outside the restaurant in question identifies them as such). However, I also only had a very small window of time between classes during which I did have to get some homework done. Deciding that academic success was of more importance than stuffing my face with McAwesome, I pulled a psychological trick on myself.

One of the most direct routes off campus to the street McDelicious is on is through the basement of the Tanner Building. Because there's a deli in the basement called The Blue Line which has a general delicious assortment of food to put in my mouth, I figured that I'd look at what the specials of the day were, just out of curiosity. If none of them piqued my interest, I'd continue on toward chickeny Nirvana. However, should anything catch my eye...

I was quasi-delighted to see that Thursday is enchilada day at The Blue Line. I'd gotten them before and remembered being relatively pleased. However, I also noticed that the quesadilla bar was also an option. Curious to see what was afoot, I watched as the guy in front of me ordered a quesadilla. Here's the rundown: you get a base of a wheat tortilla with three cheeses. That's like $3. From there, you can add chicken, beef, or rice for an additional 75¢ (I opted for chicken and rice). You can also get green/red peppers, tomatoes, olives, sour cream, and guacamole stuffed inside for 30¢ a pop (I asked for green peppers, tomatoes, sour cream, and guac). After a quick run through that toasting conveyor belt thing, it was melted, toasty, and ready for my face.

True story: this thing was the best quesadilla I've ever had in my life--and this is after getting free quesadillas whenever I wanted for two summers at Chipotle. Rarely do I get to enjoy the experience of having a mouth full of quesadilla, since the standard quesadilla is pretty thin. It was straight up thebomb.com.

That being said, if you live in Provo and want a sweet action Thursday lunch that promises to please, check out The Blue Line. If you're not, cry about it, it'll help you sleep at night.

Aside from this discovery of the week, I'm doing well. I got a book review published in the student journal I volunteer for, the play(s) I'm in opens next week (one night only!), and I'm looking forward to a weekend of excellence. I'm going to a Harry Potter themed Preference Dance with my friend Joe's-Way tomorrow night, then watching Om Shanti Om with Grandma and some friends on Saturday. In the event of my feeling like it, I may or may not take pictures of myself as Professor Trelawny.

Happy Thursday! Eat a quesadilla--but only if it's a good one!

KYOOT!

2010-01-29T17:59:00.010-07:00

I LOVE KITTEHZ.

Anyway, as my friend Richard pointed out, I've been extraordinarily absent from the Blogosphere as of late. This is due to heart-stoppingly large amounts of homework. I know, I know, what else is new? Surprisingly little, to be honest.

That being said, I'd like to pose a question that has been vexing me for some time.

Does anyone remember the One-Eyed One-Horned Flying Purple People Eater? I know the illustrations of him usually indicate that his body is purple, but the hyphen placement changes the whole meaning...

One-Eyed One-Horned Flying Purple-People Eater?

OR

One-Eyed One-Horned Flying Purple People-Eater?

Which is it? Seriously, is there a planet of purple people out there that this monster savagely eats on a regular basis? If so, why this planet? Are they tiny people? Can he pop them like french fries? Do they taste better than normal people? If so, what can we do as a race of people to taste better, thus reestablishing our superiority over these mysterious purple people?

Any and all input on the subject would set my mind at ease.

Now, before I go, I feel as if I should leave you with something else...hang out, it's coming to me...

Oh! Got it! This kid can't be older than six or seven, but he's the hottest tectonic dancer I've seen since I discovered tectonic dancing like a month ago.

Harry Potter's Tweets

2010-01-22T13:26:00.002-07:00

1. Nearly Headless Nick keeps following me around. He's becoming a real pain in the neck--GET IT!? PAIN IN THE NECK! LAUGH NOW OR I WON'T KILL VOLDEMORT AND EVERYONE WILL DIE!

2. Malfoy made fun of me again today. I'm jealous of the fact that he has such shiny blond hair. And parents.

3. Ron is pretty dumb. Sometimes I just want to tell him to eat slugs--GET IT!? EAT SLUGS! IT'S LIKE THAT ONE TIME IN OUR SECOND YEAR! LAUGH NOW OR I WON'T KILL VOLDEMORT AND EVERYONE WILL DIE!

4. I caught Cho kissing Cedric today. Now I know who the real Hogwarts Express is--and it's no scarlet steam engine on top of Platform 9 3/4.

5. Sometimes people make fun of my scar. This makes me go to the Room of Requirement to cry about my DEAD PARENTS--GOSH, THEY'RE SO DEAD! DOESN'T ANYONE KNOW THAT!?

6. In the past two years, both Sirius and Dumbledore died. That's two more for my ever increasing list of DEAD PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME CRY AT NIGHT AND JUSTIFY MY NEED TO IMPETUOUSLY FIND DANGER, THUS THREATENING MY LIFE EVEN THOUGH I'M THE CHOSEN ONE! PITY ME NOW OR I WON'T KILL VOLDEMORT AND EVERYONE WILL DIE!

7. Today, I beat a dragon in one-on-one combat. Too bad I can't beat my own self-pity enough to get Cho to go out with me.

8. I'm so emo, I'm going to cut my wrists so I can have scars to match the ones on my head--THE ONE MADE BY VOLDEMORT THE NIGHT HE KILLED MY PARENTS!

9. Dudley punched me in the face today. It made me want to punch Voldemort in the face--WHICH I WON'T DO UNLESS PEOPLE START TREATING ME LIKE THE HERO I AM! I'M SO SELF-SACRIFICING!

10. Writing in Tom Riddle's diary is like getting your soul sucked out through your mouth. Oh, wait, that's a dementor attack. So many tragic things happen to me that I can't separate one horrifying experience from the next. TELL ME HOW COOL I AM NOW OR I WON'T KILL VOLDEMORT AND EVERYONE WILL DIE!

Pocahontas's Tweets

2010-01-12T13:37:00.005-07:00

1. Brb, Dad's busting out the drums of war.

2. Told John today that we only have corn, not gold. The expression on his face when he found out I could speak English? Priceless.

3. Talking to a tree about my problems AGAIN. BBL.

4. Does anybody else wonder why John has an American accent when America hasn't been invented yet LOL

5. Still wondering if I should marry Kocoum. Still wondering if I should spend so much time making important life decisions based on advice given to me by rivers.

6. Tried painting with all the colors of the wind today. Got paint in my eyes and screamed like a banshee.

7. Totally stole the Medicine Man's bag--PARTAY IN MY WIGWAM TONIGHT!

8. If Meeko tries to awkwardly hook me up with John again, I'm skinning him and trading him in for a compass.

9. John Smith is sooo hot--too bad he's trying to exterminate my people.

10. Saved John's life today. Too bad my Dad followed through with his tomahawk swing. Ow.

MY LIIIFE

2009-12-10T16:20:00.004-07:00

It's been a little while since I've last updated. Rest assured that it's been because I've been up to my ears in homework, not because I wish to neglect my little readership base. Seriously, ask any of my roommates where I was until one in the morning every night last week, they'll tell you I was studying in the library.

Anyway, as I sit her in the 9,000,000 degree computer lab, I've decided to do another "Things That Have Been Making Me Happy As Of Late" post, so let's get right to it!

Chanter lessons: I've been making rapid progress on the chanter lately. Perhaps it's because my sight reading has drastically improved or because I'm finally getting a feeling for how bagpipe music is supposed to sound, but it doesn't take me nearly as long to learn songs these days. My teacher is abounding with encouraging commentary and fun songs to learn, so I've been enjoying spending time under her tutelage. That, and she busted out her pipes for me during our lesson today [I told her it was my Christmas wish]. SHE'S SO COOL. I can't wait to get my own set of pipes.
School: I refuse to be dishonest, so I'll divulge just how well I've been doing in school this semester. I've gotten A's on all my tests and papers, including a 157/150 on my rather stressful second triterm for British Literary History. By the end of the semester, I'm anticipating ending all of my classes with at least an A-. AND TODAY WAS THE LAST DAY OF CLASSES! SCORE.
Reading: Lately, I've been rereading Invasive Procedures by Orson Scott Card [remember when I got him to autograph it for me?]. I picked it up again because it was on hand. It's alright, but definitely not his best work [which would be anything with affiliated with Ender Wiggin]. However, what luck should come upon me but a recommendation from my favorite professor of the year, Dr. Petersen! During a discussion of nostalgia for Medieval ideals [or what they believed to be Medieval ideals] during the 18th century, she somehow brought up Dan Brown and the tripe he produces and passes off as "conspiracy fiction". She proceeded to recommend we read Foucalt's Pendulum by Umberto Eco--essentially, Dan Brown is Eco-Lite. I picked it up from the library yesteryday and BOY, it is hefty! It should last me clear through vacation!
Broadway: For extra credit in my Theatre History class, we were given the opportunity to perform an excerpt from any song performed on Broadway at any point in the history of American theatre. Seizing the opportunity, I selected a partner and we sang "It Sucks To Be Me" from Avenue Q. I won't lie, it was pretty brilliant. I also helped out another friend of mine while ribbon dancing with three other people while she "sang"/rhythmically spoke "Over the Moon" from Rent. All in all, it was a good day in the theatre.
Theatre: Speaking of which, after two years of rejected auditions, I finally got into a Mask Club next semester! I'm going to be in Too Much Light Makes The Baby Go Blind, a Neofuturist play that will be directed by my dear friend Keith. It goes up March 4th, the day before my birthday, so if any of you have any sense of birthday wish fulfillment, you'll come see it. Mark it on your calenders!
Pitas: Remember that post I wrote FOREVER ago about aptly naming your food establishment [hint: this is the same post in which I said I would open a restaurant called The Steak Dungeon]? Anyway, recently, I decided to give The Pita Pit another shot. IT'S DELICIOUS. I now love pitas with a burning fury that shall never be quenched.
Ward Choir: This Sunday will be our ward Christmas program. Being on the ward choir council has been nice because it's prompted me to start going to choir--which is such a wonderful way to start the Sabbath! It also fills me with the Spirit and helps me to focus on how music puts us in an attitude of worship.
Music Status Updates: In case some of you haven't been avidly following my status updates on Facebook/Twitter [yes, I have a Twitter now], I've started using them to broadcast my choices of Songs of the Day. I pick two songs that usually related by genre, sound, content, or mood. You should check them out--I'm doing this to educate people about supremely excellent music. I'm such a saint.

That's all I can think of at present. As you can clearly tell, I've been a happy lassie as of late--AND I'LL BE HOME IN EIGHT DAYS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Happy Thursday!